Conflict During the Coronavirus

COVID-19 has upended many of the expectations we had for 2020. Vacations were cancelled, weddings postponed, and graduation parties reduced to video calls. This situation is far from ideal.

In the midst of the pandemic, each of us will fall somewhere on a spectrum of risk tolerance. Regardless of where you fall on this spectrum, it is critical to acknowledge that no one is approaching the coronavirus with the same lens as you.

Here is what we know for sure: There are members of NASA’s Johnson Space Center community who have lost family and friends to the coronavirus. Some of our colleagues have a compromised immune system. There are people with children or parents at home who are at risk. There are people who struggled with anxiety before the pandemic, and now they are overwhelmed with it. There are parents who are struggling to balance their responsibilities at home and at work — two worlds that have morphed into one.

At the end of the day, you won’t always know what others are going through. We cannot make assumptions about our co-workers. As we begin to step through the phased return to the worksite, we must be mindful that there are different opinions and approaches to COVID-19. The most important thing is to be respectful of each other. We are under a significant amount of stress (whether we realize it or not), and disrespectful behavior only exacerbates this situation. NASA’s Unity Campaign encourages us to transcend the artificial barriers we put up between us and to connect with each other, especially now that we are physically distant from one another.

It is everyone’s job to maintain a work environment that aligns with the JSC Expected Behaviors. All employees are responsible for treating individuals with respect, courtesy, and fairness.

Conflict can result when needs and expectations are not being met. (“You said you would take out the trash!” or “Why didn’t you get that report to me on time?”) Conflict surrounding COVID-19 generally stems from five categories: fear, scarcity, grief or loss, bias, and a lack of communication — or miscommunication. Regardless of the source of the conflict, all parties involved should seek to deescalate the conflict situation.

Everyone can benefit from learning conflict-resolution skills. Here are a few ground rules to keep in mind as you navigate difficult conversations at work:

• Think before you speak. This may seem simple, but so many personal and professional disputes could be prevented if we followed this simple rule.
• Address the conflict early. Don’t wait for things to boil over.
• Focus on the dispute, not the person. Remember when Brené Brown came to Johnson? She said, “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.” Be clear about what it is that you need from your colleagues.
• Be respectful, even if the other person is not.

That last point can be difficult. We often try to justify our escalation because the other person may have initiated the conflict. Start with grounding yourself. Take a few deep breaths, relax any parts of your body that are tensed up, and label your current emotion. Ultimately, the best way to deescalate a conflict is to display empathy. This sounds counterintuitive, right? Why should I be empathetic when the other person is adding fuel to the fire? Empathy is key because the goal isn’t to win the argument; the goal is to agree to respect one another’s perspective.

Finally, please know that you do not have to resolve conflict on your own. Reach out to your supervisor or to a member of Johnson’s Resolving Issues team for assistance or advice.